Everything in Bolehland is half-baked, not baked, or badly baked. You can find these lack of quality in everything, be that education institutions, politicians, political parties, industry, religion, “higher” academic institutions, and more. Whatever you look at in Bolehland, the halal sticker hides the glaring truth it is fcuked-up.

Our half-baked, not baked, or badly baked policies extend from getting our poor kids to learn science in non-baked English one year to learning saints in Ketuananspeak the next to our achievements in plagiarism and appropriation of researches by others, thus we get our half-baked “PhDs” discovering most of the achievements were first by the half-baked heroes of Ketuanan Bolehland. Recently, we claimed the invention of the like of an old Chinese sailboat (modelled in an exhibit in a Jakarta museum) was by our genius – only to have our Indon bros shamed us by categorically stating not so.

In foreign affairs many half-baked policies abound, the most recent of which is the half-baked adventurism of saving the Palestinians from the bullets, bombs, and torture of the Zionists. Instead of getting the pendatangs to be “grateful” to us, the Palestinians kicked up a great big halal fuss saying they prefer to be back to Gaza to face certain death!

Fancy that! When we’ve even trained our school children into a mighty militant army of half-baked half-witted warriors, those we’ve appointed ourselves say “no thanks, fcuk off, we want to suffer and die without your kind help”!

This is how we are seen by the rest of the world. This is how Muslims and others are laughing at us, or shaking their heads and sighing. While we are full of our ignorant and arrogant selves, totally drunk with fantasies and mad delusions how great we are. And those, we can call our Seedy Masturba moments.

When caught with her knickers down, Seedy Masturba, relative of Sergei Silly Samurai Saleh by way of tribal, same cave dwellers’ intraspecific, incestral traits, and interspecific aggressive “survival” traits towards perceived outside “threats”. That’s how the genetics of such low animals work, and how they incestrously hold together to perpetuate themselves. Sometimes that means to fcuk themselves to survive, like some royal breeds, the relatives marry each other to protect their bloodlines – and produce sorry retards (who are in turn worshiped by natural or deliberate retards).

Seedy Masturba and relative Sergei Samurai Silly Saleh both exhibit the aggressive and backward behaviour of the lower animals. Rather than their arrogant and “tough nut” fake front they like to strut, they loudly betray their actual insecure and inadequate real selves. That fools nobody except fellow kampong aggressive screeching chest-thumping lowlife who’d always thought nothing of covering themselves in red, run amok to defend Orang Asli land, Ketuanan way of life, and, of course, ham chicken sandwich, kampong mosquitoes and cockroaches.

The glaring sad and disappointing fact is rather than stirring and rabid rabble-rousing their low-life fans with genuine facts and intellectual and leadership abilities, our Ham Tuah and Aminah Kampung fool the indignant Mat Longkang pond slime with weird unbelievable lies flavoured with racist overtones and fake religious self-righteousness. Only to be easily caught out and shot right down – with a huge black eye eyewatering massive fine!

Wahlau! Even Heaven doesn’t want to help out with paying the giant fine with Her small change. It was left to the reptile-skinned fake mullahs to con the public with a fund-raising “jihad”!! Since when is lying halal? Our fake mullahs are in fact sinfully turning the indefensible defence of willful lying and going against the Almighty into a “jihad”! Religion can’t be worst than that! Maybe only with our half-baked fake mullahs?

It is a very well-known fact that Islam came to the Chinese (in both directions) long long ago. Arrival of Islam to China on a big scale (meaning not just via some missionaries and some travellers to the Middle East) was centuries before it came to South East Asia. Around then, some Chinese became great scholars of Islam and we’re consulted for their knowledge on Islam.

The holy book instruct followers to go as far as China to learn from the Chinese. Every now and then I get to hear this instructions from Bolehlanders. Last year a Grab driver leaned all the way back on his seat to tell me this. Yes, like from the many many Arabs I’ve come across. That’s no way like the behaviour of those fake Muslims of Bolehland, those always twitching uncontrollably and always ready to appoint themselves to come to the forefront to “defend Islam”. Which is weird.

Islam is, so it seems, a strong religion. So is its deity. So how is it that either needs mere mortal kampong tossers and self-shagging morons to “defend” it? Any almighty whatever would easily have deadly lasers and death rays zap and vaporise any “kafir” and everything else, QED, quite easily done, Amen.

So why the need for embarrassing infantile wnakers jerking around with a samurai sword and menacing others who don’t give a flying fcuk over such silly immature antics. Ditto with seriously thick entities like Aminah Kampung mouthing lies and holy garbage all over the place – just to be whack across the other two cheeks with a whopping huge fine of near a million sweet ones!

And being nicely shamed for her gross stupidity and ignorance, she’s hiding all that by coming back with more anti-Islam hate for the Chinese whom the Arabs and true Muslims so love. What a humiliating self-defeating racist waste of effort to work against the instruction of the Almighty to respect, adore, and learn from the Chinese.

Only in Bolehland can you find such appallingly self-obsessed embarrassing uncivilised monkeys of munafiqs and fake followers of a religion. Since when has any deity instructed any follower to be racist to any Chinese?
Say, why would you call G*d’s people “pigs”?! The Almighty instructed you to do that?! When the holy instruction is for you to go as far as China to learn from the Chinese, you start being abusiti and insulting to your teachers. That is being kurang ajar, your parents and mullahs don’t teach you to walk the right path, what?!

To be fair, I get my money’s worth plus two free gifts following the antics of Sergei Silly Samurai Saleh and Aminah Kampung Seedy Masturba. I can’t really complain about the silly kampong longkang winged asses trying to incite the village moron socks and sandwich inspectors, firebomb terrorists to show their faith is not about peace, compassion, and mercy.

It’s all fine by me, I’m all for the self-serving moron munafiqs to expose themselves, for them and their fake mullahs, their religion is all about racism, hypocrisy, control freakery, Mercedes Benzs, and playing second erhu to the superior Chinese and Indians, “where got” in the holy instructions to harass, bully, and hate the others?

Why go through such great and super dumb antics and menacing behaviour to show out loud you are insecure and inadequate – and, frankly, incapable and practically useless at getting at “the others”? Aiyoyoh! After trying so hard to get that momentary erection but definitely getting none ever, it is better to give up and calling it a day.

It is very clear and obvious there’s some kind of bias at work here and that’s working against our worthless good for nothing types: the holy words sez go as far as China to learn from its superior people, that’s that! The only place you hapless monkeys need to go to is Almighty China. The best thing to do to learn from the blessed Chinese, Alhamdullilah, Amin..!

And there’s nothing that sez to learn from you disappointing monkeys. Or even listen to you. So Sergei Silly Samurai Saleh and Aminah Kampung Seedy Masturba, do a jihad for your plane tickets to China, get your mullahs and Mat Kampungs ham-sters to do the right thing, help out. If anything, you’ll find a lot of people eating ham ham, ham pork sandwiches, you’ll go hoarse crying out loud and making yourselves great martyrs over your halal ham cause. All with the superior Chinese not giving your great cause the holy halal sh*t, wtf!

Now sit back and watch me tuck in a ham ham halal ham burger. Make the ham ham char siew flavour. Barbecue that just right, the fragrance of the ham ham will knock you out! Use brown bread that taste much much better even if you monkeys are only into soft white bread like for the toothless toothpaste eaters.

Add quality cheese, hey, you monkeys are only into processed plastic fcuking “cheese”, wtf! Add tasty vegetables and great quality pickles, use Yahudi dill, onion gherkins, fermented for the al-kohol flavour. Add slivers of roasted aubergine (brinjal to you damn natives).

Add nice bits of roasted green, yellow, red peppers. Use the air fryer for a quick murder to keep them juicy. Use helpings of mustard seeds, sesame seeds. Use mustard sauce not fcuking tomato sauce.

If you don’t find this burger heaven on earth, you are in Hell. Go back to fcuking up your food with cheap fcuking tomato, chilli sauces and that thing with the toilet colour you call “kichap”.

Now fcuk off with your adulterated fcuked-up “food”, you should join Sergei Samurai Silly Saleh and that thick-looking Aminah Kampung Seedy Masturba.

Sergei Samurai Silly Saleh, use Stolichnaya (even the Latvian copy) to drown your veg for pickles, you’ll never thank me and Mother Russia(Latvia?) enough, all ham dulilah! Silly Saleh seems the type who turns aggressive after a couple of small drinks, but Aminah Kampung Seedy Masturba I’d like to drink her under the table, I suspect she’s a tigress inside her freaking dumb exterior, you sure will get plenty of scratch marks on your back the next morning – and that’s only from her steadying herself on you on the way to prayers the next morning, Wild Thing!

Thus concludes my weekend sermon, Amen!

(here’s one for Voodoo Child:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FehfuJIabqM&pp=ygUqSGVuZHJpeCBXaWxkIHRoaW5nIHlvdSBtYWtlIG15IGNvY2sgc2NyZWFt